


Tails

by Exdraghunt



Series: Wings and Tails [4]
Category: LazyTown
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-19
Updated: 2017-10-04
Packaged: 2018-09-18 15:25:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 12,766
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9390884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Exdraghunt/pseuds/Exdraghunt
Summary: In the old legends, it is said that one can tell an elf from a human by making them turn around. Elves are hollow from behind, have backs of tree bark, or the tail of a cow or fox.It's good to know that the old myths aren't entirely wrong. But is LazyTown ready for the magical folk in their midst?(Continues on from Wings)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by reading a bunch of old Scandanavian folktales. Because the mental image of Sporty with a tail was just too damn cute to pass up.

 

 

For once, Sportacus found himself quite excited to send the kids home for the day. He loved playing with them, of course. Loved their enthusiasm for learning, their zeal for life, but now Sportacus had something else to look forward to at the end of the day than just an empty airship.

Heading to the outskirts of town, Sportacus eagerly opened the hatch that led down to Robbie’s lair and hopped inside. The two had been “courting” for only a few days now, but Robbie had confessed that he slept better with Sportacus there, and so the elf made an effort to be there every night for his boyfriend.

Dropping down into the lair, the first thing Sportacus noticed was that the armchair in the middle of the room was empty, and that there was no sign of Robbie. The second thing he noticed was the sound of running water, and singing, coming from one of the back rooms.

Cautiously, Sportacus crept towards the sound. Rarely was he privileged enough to hear his boyfriend sing. Robbie’s voice could go much deeper than one expected from hearing him speaking. A shiver ran down Sportacus’s spine as that lovely voice hit an especially deep note that bottomed out into a growl. Oh, he could listen to that sound all day.

Finding the door to the bathroom, Sportacus couldn’t help but gently push it open. Steam wafted out, and the singing got much louder. Some of the sounds Robbie was making were almost sinful, that bass voice making Sportacus light headed the longer he listened. He was so distracted he didn’t notice that the running water had been turned off, until the curtain of the shower opened and Robbie spotted his audience. With a shriek of surprise, the man slipped in the wet tub and fell over in a flurry of black feathers.

“Robbie!” Sportacus rushed forward and caught his boyfriend before he could bash his head against the edge of the tub. “Are you alright?”

“S-sportacus?!” Robbie hastily covered his crotch with both hands and struggled to escape his boyfriend’s strong arms without compromising his decency. “Do elves not understand the concept of knocking?!”

“Sorry, Robbie.” Sportacus easily set the man back on his feet and handed him a towel, “I didn’t want to interrupt your singing. It was, ah, very nice.”

“My singing?” Robbie wrapped the towel securely around his waist and narrowed his eyes at the elf, trying to decide if Sportacus was joking or not. “And that made you barge in on me in the shower?”

“It’s _very nice._ ” Sportacus emphasized. He let his eyes linger for a moment on the parts of his boyfriend that were exposed. “You should sing more often.”

“Hmmmmmaybe.” Robbie shifted a bit as he noticed the look on Sportacus’s face. Robbie knew full well that his body wasn’t a particularly impressive sight, certainly nothing like his boyfriend’s. Sportacus put so much emphasis on being healthy and fit, Robbie still wasn’t quite sure what the elf saw in him at all.

Noticing how uncomfortable Robbie seemed, Sportacus tore his gaze away and gently touched one of his wings instead. “Would you like me to preen your feathers?”

“I- . . . yes please.” Now that Robbie’s wings had grown in fully, the feathers required regular care to keep them in good shape. It was quite a lot of bother to Robbie, but Sportacus apparently greatly enjoyed doing it so Robbie graciously allowed it.

Awkwardly, Robbie shuffled into the bedroom while trying very hard not to drop the towel around his waist. It went alright until he trod on his own wingtip and had to use both hands to keep himself from smashing headlong into the end of the bed.

“You should be more careful, Robbie.” Sportacus commented, once more setting his boyfriend back on his feet. The addition of more weight and bulk to his back had done nothing for the man’s clumsy nature.

“Well if these damn wings weren’t so long-” Robbie crossed his arms, belatedly realizing that his towel was now on the floor. He tried to cover his crotch, before sighing and deciding to just give up. “I guess you might as well look. Clearly, luck is not with me today.”

“Then it must be with me.” Sportacus said with a smile. “You don’t have to feel shy, I like looking at you.”

Robbie went bright red, crossing to a small dresser to at least get some underwear. He wasn’t in the mood to have a conversation while naked. Once he was at least somewhat covered, he turned to look Sportacus up and down critically. The elf was still staring, and also still fully clothed. “Well? If you’re going to look at me naked, you have to return the favor. Come on, strip.”

Now it was Sportacus’s turn to blush. He slipped off his boots and bracers, then divested himself of his vest and shirt. That wasn’t enough for Robbie, though. He gestured with one hand, indicating that the elf needed to remove his pants, too. Sportacus unbuttoned his fly, but paused before he actually slipped his pants down his hips.

“You should know.” Sportacus said cautiously. “My ears aren’t the only inhuman thing about me. I just. . . don’t want you to be too surprised.”

Okay, now Robbie was even more insatiably curious. None of the mythology he had read mentioned elf genitalia. Was it really so different from a humans?

Sportacus pushed his pants down and kicked them off, and Robbie caught sight of something fluffy about his waist. It uncoiled, and Robbie’s brain stuttered to a halt.

“You have a tail?!” Robbie grabbed Sportacus and twisted him to get a better view of his backside. Emerging from just above his briefs (which were blue with a racing stripe down the side, the elf was nothing if not consistent) was a long, furred tail. It was like a cross between a cat and a cow, covered in short, dark brown fur that lengthened to a blonde puff at the very tip. Robbie went to stroke the fluffy tip, only for the tail to twitch out of his hand. There were old myths that mentioned elves and other hidden folk possessing tails, but since Sportacus wasn’t hollow in the back, or covered in tree bark, he hadn’t put any weight behind the stories of tails either. Clearly, the old fairytales were right about at least one thing.

“Um, yes.” Sportacus concentrated, and managed to get his tail to stay still long enough for Robbie to touch it. No one had touched his tail in years, he normally kept it wound tightly around his waist and hidden under his pants. “Not all elves do, but my particular lineage does.”

“I can’t believe you hid this from me.” Robbie was too delighted by this discovery to even be that angry. He watched as Sportacus’s tail twitched back and forth, like that of a cat, and couldn’t resist touching the base where skin turned to fur. A ripple ran up the muscles of the elf’s back in response, clearly this was another sensitive area.

“Elves tend to be very private folk. In the old days, we had to hide our tails at all costs from humans.” Sportacus gave a little shrug. “I – didn’t know how you’d take it.”

“Do I really look like someone who is in a position to judge someone for having a tail.” Robbie deadpanned, gesturing towards the large, very noticeable pair of wings framing his body.

“You have a point.” Sportacus laughed, then retrieved a small brush used for preening feathers and patted the bed. “Now, I believe I offered to brush your wings?”

Robbie agreeably sat down cross-legged on the edge of the bed so that his wings draped off the side, giving Sportacus easy access to all his feathers. It was a new nightly ritual that accompanied the painkilling salve, with Sportacus going through each feather and making sure the barbs were all aligned and zipped up properly. It was nice, and calming, and never failed to put Robbie to sleep by the time it was finished.

“You know, it’s been a week.” Sportacus commented idly as he worked his way through the long primary feathers of Robbie’s right wing.

“A week?” Robbie didn’t have the best sense of time passing, but he was pretty sure there wasn’t anything significant that had happened a week ago. “A week since what?”

“Since you asked me to go out without my hat on.” Sportacus explained. It seemed like so much longer, but a look at the calendar confirmed it. “You said if I went a week without my hat, you would consider letting the kids see your wings.”

“I. Did say that, didn’t I.” Robbie had rather hoped Sportacus had forgotten that little bet. “I don’t know. Pointy ears aren’t really that big a deal compared to an enormous pair of wings.”

“You know the townspeople won’t mind, Robbie.” Sportacus insisted. “The kids really miss you, Robbie. They miss your costumes, and games, and schemes and they keep asking me where you went.”

Robbie bit his lip. He did miss going aboveground. Walking around Lazytown. Even, ugh, talking to people. As much of a loner as he considered himself, he couldn’t isolate himself forever.

“I’ll be with you the entire time, I promise.” Sportacus encouraged. “I’ll. . . I’ll even stop hiding my tail.”

Well, he couldn’t really argue against that offer. Robbie sighed. “Fine. I’ll go up with you tomorrow. But not before noon! And you have to go first.”

“Okay, Robbie.” The idea made Sportacus nervous, he’d been lectured quite extensively before leaving Alfheim that he wasn’t supposed to let humans see his ears and tail, but these were special circumstances. And Lazytown was a special place.

Finishing up with preening Robbie’s wings, the pair laid down in the bed and pulled up the covers. Sportacus was greatly enjoying the new skin-to-skin contact that resulted from their lack of clothing, allowing him to get even closer to his boyfriend. His tail, which was very excited to be free, wrapped around Robbie to gently curl amongst his feathers. This courtship was going even better than he had imagined. Hopefully, he was right at the next day went as well as he had predicted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you're wondering what Robbie's singing sounds like, please consider this recording of Stefan Karl Stefansson. Because Hot. Damn.
> 
> http://exdraghunt.tumblr.com/post/155055798762/trypanophilia-this-is-stef%C3%A1n-karl-stef%C3%A1nsson


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AKA: Magical creatures struggle with clothes.

 

When Robbie awoke in the morning, he was alone in bed. That wasn’t unusual. Sportacus always awoke before his boyfriend, except in cases when Robbie was awake at ungodly hours due to pain or nightmares, and the elf usually went up to his airship to avoid disturbing Robbie with his morning exercises.

 Groggily, Robbie slipped out of bed with a sheet wrapped around him and stumbled towards the kitchen with the intent of getting his hands on some coffee. He managed to make it as far as the main room of his lair before he tripped on the fabric trailing on the floor and face planted.

 With a loud, put-upon groan, Robbie contemplated just staying on the floor. It wasn’t all that uncomfortable, at least he had his blanket. Maybe he should build something that would bring him food and coffee without even having to get up. Of course, building something would also require getting off the floor. Nevermind then.

 That was, of course, how Sportacus found him. The elf popped down into the lair to wake up his boyfriend and make sure he ate something, only to find a heap of black feathers and purple fabric on the floor.

 “Robbie!” Sportacus immediately rushed over, panic beginning to build. Was Robbie seriously injured? Why hadn’t his crystal beeped to alert him of the danger? Was the magical relic malfunctioning? “Where are you hurt? What happened?”

 “Need. Coffee.” Robbie muttered as he was untangled from the sheet and lifted up into Sportacus’s strong arms.

 Sportacus rolled his eyes as he realized that his boyfriend was not, in fact, injured or unwell. He was just under-caffinated. “How about some tea instead?” He suggested as he set Robbie down in his armchair.

 “Whatever.” Robbie responded, not yet awake enough to argue. “As long as it has caffeine in it.”

 Though the kitchen in Robbie’s lair was a mine field of strange devices and contraptions, Sportacus had figured out enough to at least make hot water and locate a pair of reasonably clean mugs. Soon, he had two steaming cups of tea (with one uncaffinated for himself) to go back out into the main room with.

 “Mmm.” Robbie cradled the warm mug in his hands, blowing on it before taking a sip. It was perfect. “It’s acceptable. I guess you can stay.”

 “I’m glad it meets with your approval.” Sportacus said with amusement. He perched himself on the arm of Robbie’s chair, brushing one of the man’s long wings out of his way. Without his sheet there to cover himself, the man was using his feathers as a makeshift blanket for warmth instead. “Are you awake enough to get dressed and come outside with me?”

 “Uh. Dressed. Right.” Because he hadn’t gone to bed in pajamas, and his dressing robe didn’t fit over his wings anymore. Setting the empty mug aside, he shuffled towards his disguise tubes to find something he could wear. He’d managed to alter a couple outfits, at least, including a version of his usual outfit. It was this that he changed into now with a snap and a spin, sending a few black feathers floating through the air as he woozily halted. It was a little harder to do his quick changes with the wings sending him off balance, but still faster and less effort than actually changing clothes by hand.

 Properly attired, Robbie smoothed down his feathers and walked back over to Sportacus. Hands on his hips, he looked the elf over critically. “And what about you?”

 “Me?” Sportacus was wearing what he always did, sans hat, of course, as he’d promised not to. “What is wrong with what I’m wearing?”

 “I seem to recall last night that you promised to leave a certain. . . tail exposed?” Robbie reminded.

 “Ah, yes.” Sportacus had automatically put his clothes on normally that morning, winding his tail tightly about his waist so that it was hidden completely under his pants. He unbuttoned his fly and shimmied his pants down his waist a bit, until his tail escaped the fabric to swish languidly behind him. It was then that he encountered a slight predicament, because he couldn’t pull up his pants again with his tail in the way and was left with his pants hanging half off his hips. “Um. This might be a problem.”

 Robbie rolled his eyes as he noticed Sportacus’s little issue. While he greatly enjoyed the sight off his tantalizing hipbones peeking out between the hem of his shirt and the waistband of his pants, it probably wasn’t an appropriate view for the kids. “Oh for god’s sake. Take off your pants and give them to me.”

 Sportacus agreeably stepped out off his pants and passed them over, watching with interest as Robbie went over to his sewing supplies and sat down. Taking out scissors, he deftly cut open the center back of the waistband, then ran it through his machine. Quicker than Sportacus thought possible, his pants had been handed back to him.

 “Wow, Robbie, that was fast.” Sportacus commented with a smile as he stepped back into his pants and pulled them up. Now, his tail nested comfortably into the new slit in the waistband, while a button overtop ensured that his pants would stay up securely. “I am always amazed at how good you are at making things.”

 “Yeah, well. Somebody’s got to do it.” Robbie shrugged deferentially, though his cheeks tinged pink at the praise.

 “Very comfortable.” Sportacus twisted, bending to touch his toes a couple times, then stretching his arms above his head. His tail flicked happily behind him, clearly pleased to be free. It was an endearing sight, making Sportacus look rather like an overgrown cat. The comparison was only strengthened when he stepped closer to Robbie and rubbed his cheek against his boyfriend with a loud purr.

 Before Robbie could really register what happened, Sportacus was backflipping towards the lair entrance and climbing the ladder. “Come on, Robbie! Let’s go!”

 “Wh-. Hang on!” Robbie grabbed a coat and threw it on over himself, then scrambled after his boyfriend. “Damn crazy elf. Get back here!”

 

 

Chasing after Sportacus gave Robbie a good distraction from his worries, one that ended with him winded and wheezing into his knees in the town square. Stretching with Sportacus in the mornings had made him less stiff, but that didn’t make him any more capable of running.

 “So.” Robbie panted, straightening and making sure his wings were still hidden beneath his coat. It was stiflingly hot, but he still clutched the garment around him like a safety blanket. “Do you have a plan?”

 “Well.” Sportacus was standing in his usual power stance, hands on his hips and trying to exude confidence, but the way his tail twitched behind him betrayed something else. The elf was nervous. This didn’t exactly make Robbie feel better about the situation. “The kids will be coming out here soon, once they finish eating lunch. We’ll just explain to them about non human peoples, and that we have some parts they don’t, and I’m sure it’ll all be fine.”

 “So you’re planning on winging it, basically.” Robbie translated. He heaved a sigh and dramatically threw himself down on one of the park benches, putting his head in his hands. “This is a terrible idea. There’s a reason that magical people don’t live amoung humans. I don’t know what that reason is, but I’m sure there is one.”

 “Humans have. Been known to exploit and hunt _huld_ _ufó_ _lk._ ” Sportacus admitted. “But that was a long time ago. And Lazytown is different. The people here are special.”

 Robbie just shook his head. “Why did my parents have to leave me.” He muttered softly. “Why couldn’t I have been raised around other fae?”

 “Hey, it’s okay.” Sportacus moved to kneel in front of Robbie, gently prying his hands away from his face. “You know, not all faeries live in large groups or courts. Many are solitary, living far away from other magical folk. Whoever your parents were, whatever they were, they clearly hoped you would have a better life amoung humans.”

 “Well they were wrong.” Robbie said bitterly.

 “We don’t have to do this today if you don’t want to.” Sportacus sat down on the bench and wrapped his arms around Robbie. “I don’t want to force you into something you don’t want to do. You can go back home, and I’ll tell the children you still aren’t feeling good.”

 It was an out. An out that Robbie could so easily take. It was very tempting. But, he had made a deal. Sportacus had fulfilled it, had gone outside in front of the entire town so obviously as an elf for a full week. And, though he hadn’t won the hearts of the _entire_ town, nobody had tried to force him out. Maybe, Robbie could finally find some place where he could feel. . . accepted.

 “I- I think maybe I can.” Somewhere, inside himself, Robbie was trying to dig up some courage. Having Sportacus there, it helped.

 “I’ll go first.” Sportacus promised. “And then, you can go after if you want. I just want you to be happy. And, I don’t think being forced to hide part of yourself will do that.”

 Any further conversation was halted by the noise of the children approaching the park. Sportacus hopped to his feet and flipped over the low wall to meet them, feeling the need to use up his nervous energy somehow. He had run through this encounter a few times before, in his mind. Considered what he might say, what the children would do. Right now, though, he couldn’t remember any of that. Couldn’t even let himself think about that, if he was honest. Because if he thought about what could happen, what might happen, he’d be too nervous to ever actually go through with it.

 Keeping moving, then, was the answer. If he was concentrating on acrobatics, he couldn’t think about the possible consequences of what he was about to do.

 It was a sign of how accustomed the children were to Sportacus’ presence that they didn’t even startle when he suddenly landed beside them. Instead, they just greeted him with their usual cheery enthusiasm. The kids were all discussing what they wanted to play for the afternoon, so excited that it took them all a moment to notice their hero’s new. . . addition.

 Stephanie, the most observant of the group, was the first to notice. She looked over at Sportacus , who was being unusually quiet, and saw something strange move behind him. “Wait, Sportacus. Is there something on your back?”

 Trixie immediately zipped behind the hero, grabbing his tail and tugging on it. Satisfied that it truly was attached, she held it up for the others to see. “Look, Sportacus has a _tail!_ ”

 “Whoaaaaaa!” Ziggy looked at the fuzzy appendage Trixie had in her hands, reaching out to pet the long tuft of fur on the end. “It’s so soft. Wow, Sportacus, this is so cool! When did you grow a tail?!”

 Sportacus suppressed a wince when he felt a sticky hand wrap around his tail (he’d need to brush the candy residue out of his fur later), and reminded himself that the kids weren’t being malicious by pulling on his tail. Even if it hurt a bit. “I didn’t grow a tail, I’ve always had it. I just usually kept it hidden, like my ears.” Sportacus squatted down and gently pried his tail from Ziggy and Trixie’s grasp, letting the other children come in to touch and feel. “You can touch, just be gentle.”

 “I want a tail.” Stingy declared, while Pixel used his wrist computer to scan Sportacus, muttering over the elf’s skeletal structure and how his tail extended from his tailbone. Definitely no fake.

 “i thought you were an elf.” Stephanie looked at Sportacus contemplatively. “Elves don’t have tails.”

 “Oh really?” Sportacus raised an eyebrow, amused by the bold statement. “What do you know about elves?”

 “They make the presents that Santa Claus delivers!” Ziggy exclaimed excitedly.

 “They’re really short, with pointy ears and pointy hats.” Trixie added, “And they live in trees and make cookies.”

 “No, they make shoes.” Stingy argued. “Nice, patent leather shoes. Like mine.” He lifted a pant leg and held out his foot for emphasis.

 “No way, guys. Elves are tall, with long hair and they live in the forest and are expert bow hunters.” Pixel chimed in. “And they know _magic_.”

 “Except, that isn’t all true. Is it?” Stephanie questioned.

 Sportacus laughed, always surprised at the variety of tales humans told about his people. “No, it isn’t all true. There are a lot of different kinds of elves. Some are small, most are the same size as humans. Some of us have pointed ears, but not all. And some of us, have tails.”

 "But you do know magic.” Ziggy insisted, looking at Sportacus with wide eyes. “Don’t you? I’ve seen you use it!”

 “Yes, I do know magic.” Sportacus ruffled Ziggy’s hair fondly. “A little bit. I’m much better at being athletic.” He dabbed for emphasis with a sharp exhale of breath. He knew the kids would be accepting. “But I’m afraid I don’t know how to make cookies. Or shoes.”

 The kids all laughed at that, and Sportacus glanced out of the corner of his eye where a certain black and purple figure lay on one of the benches nearby. Robbie was posed as though he was taking one of his usual park bench naps, but Sportacus knew full well the man was listening. And watching.

 “Now then.” Sportacus looked at the kids, tail flicking away from Ziggy as the boy attempted to capture it. “What do you know about faeries?”

“Faeries?” The kids all looked at each other, clearly realizing for the first time that if elves were real, other magical creatures were too.

“Tiny people with butterfly wings?” Stingy questioned.

“I heard they live in flowers.” Stephanie added, curious to see where this would go.

“’In ancient folklore, faeries were often portrayed as powerful beings who could wreak havoc on the lives of humans.’” Pixel read aloud from the display on his wrist computer. “’A faery is a type of mythical being or legendary creature in European folklore, a form of spirit, often described as metaphysical, supernatural, or preternatural.’”

“What does that mean?” Ziggy asked, face scrunching up as he attempted to sound out ‘preternatural’ quietly.

“The fae are a lot like elves.” Sportacus explained. “They can be very small, or human-sized. Some of them have wings, like a butterfly, or the wings of birds. Some have no wings at all. But they are all very good at magic.”

“Better than you?” Trixie said with some surprise.

“Better than me.” Sportacus confirmed. He glanced behind himself again, seeing Robbie pushing himself up off the park bench he was seated on. “There is a fae in Lazytown.”

“There is?!” The kids all looked around in excitement, as though a faery would suddenly flutter out of the bushes towards them.

“There is.” A voice much deeper than Sportacus’s confirmed. Everyone looked up to see Robbie standing there, the resulting chorus of “ROBBIE ROTTEN” making the tall man wince. “Well, if you’re all going to be like that I’ll just go back home.”

“No!” The kids all yelled.

“Don’t leave!” Ziggy grabbed Robbie’s hand, heedless of the way the man flinched in response. “Are you really a faery?”

“I-” Robbie looked between them nervously. Ziggy was staring at him with the broad smile of a seven year old that believed in magic with his whole heart, while Trixie and Stingy seemed dubiously cautious of the self-proclaimed villain. Stephanie appearing willing to make friends, while Pixel was. .. scanning him with his computer.

“I’m detecting high levels of. . . something.” Pixel frowned and tapped his wrist computer. He was having trouble getting a read on Robbie for some reason. There was something interfering with his scanning systems.

“Most computers don’t like magic.” Robbie took a deep breath, then shrugged out of his coat and let his wings unfold.

The chorus of oohs and aaahs made Robbie relax fractionally, as did the helpful hand from Sportacus on his lower back, stroking his feathers gently. Then a hand grabbed one of his long primary feathers and -yanked-, making Robbie jump a good foot in the air with a yelp.

“Trixie!” The other kids looked at the prankster, who shrugged apologetically.

“I had to make sure they were real.” Trixie protested.

“Well they’re very real.” Robbie fluffed his feathers up irritably. “And that hurt.”

An elbow from Stephanie had Trixie blurting a quick apology, then the floodgates opened and questions were coming from all sides. Robbie stammered, trying to answer what he could, but it was all a lot of confusing noise.

Seeing that his boyfriend was getting overwhelmed, Sportacus held up his hands and quieted down the children. “Whoa, guys. One question at a time. Robbie cannot answer your questions if you are all talking at once.”

Ziggy’s hand immediately shot into the air, making Sportacus laugh and point at the young boy. “Can you fly?!”

“Well, uh-” Robbie paused. He’d never really thought about that. All his life, his wings had been an annoyance. An irritant. They still were, though he was beginning to make peace with the feathery parts of himself. He had never before really made the connection between his wings and the possibility of flight. “I’ve never tried.”

“You totally should!” Trixie exclaimed. “I bet it would be awesome!”

“Well, with your wingspan, height, and weight, you should be able to achieve flight.” Pixel was punching numbers into his wrist computer rapidly. “If we find a high enough launching point-”

“My house is the tallest.” Stingy butted in.

Sportacus decided to step in again before the kids could get together to throw Robbie off a building. “Okay guys. Why don’t we let Robbie rest for a little while, and we can go play some soccer.”

Fortunately, kids were easily redirected and soon they were running off for the sports field and loudly trying to convince Stingy to let them use ‘his’ ball. Sportacus watched them go with a broad grin before turning to Robbie. “See, that wasn’t so bad.”

“Says you.” Robbie muttered, though honestly he was relieved that things had gone so well. The kids had been curious, not hostile. Not like the other children he’d known in his youth. “But if I get thrown off of the rich kid’s house, I’m blaming you.”

“I’ll make sure they don’t throw you off a house.” Sportacus promised, leaning in to give him a quick peck on the cheek. “Though I would like to see you fly some time. Now, do you want to play with us, or just watch?”

“Play?” Robbie sneered, bending down to pick up his coat and bundling it up to use as a pillow, sitting back down on his bench. “I think I’ll just take a nap, thanks.”

“Okay, Robbie.” Sportacus offered him another quick kiss, then cartwheeled off to join the kids at the sports field. Baby steps.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to Merriam Webster and Wikipedia for definitions of "faerie"


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more incredibly cute filler chapter. i can't get enough of these two.

While the kids and Sportacus laughed and played, Robbie stretched out on the park bench and got comfortable. He wasn’t actually tired, for once, but it was a lovely day and the bench was a familiar place. His wings spread out wide, one draped over the edge of the bench and the other trailing down onto the ground, with feathers puffed up to capture as much of the sun’s rays as possible. He was warm, and he had his coat-pillow, and even the sound of the kids playing couldn’t bother him that much. Not when he could open his eyes and appreciate the sight of his boyfriend’s ass in those tight blue pants as he played soccer.

Dozing in the sun was all great and wonderful until Robbie was disturbed by the very unwelcome sensation of someone stepping on his wing.

With an affronted squawk, Robbie shot upright and pulled his injured wing to himself. “Hey, what’s the big idea?!”

“Wh- Robbie Rotten?” Mayor Meanswell looked up from the papers he’d been reading with surprise. “You have wings!”

“So I’ve noticed.” Robbie snarked back, patting his feathers back into place. The sting of pain had run right up his wing to the base and settled to an unfortunately familiar dull ache between his shoulderblades.

“Robbie, are you okay?” Sportacus suddenly flipped over, his crystal having beeped in response to his boyfriend’s moment of distress. “Oh, hello Mr. Mayor.”

“Hello, Sportacus. Sorry, I was so distracted with this list Ms. Busybody gave me I stepped right on Mr. Rotten’s . . . uh. .. wing.” Mayor Meanswell faltered as his eyes were drawn to something moving behind the town hero. “Sportacus, do you have a, a tail?”

“Oh, yes!” Sportacus twisted a bit to better show off said appendage. The positive experience he’d had with the kids made him feel much more confident in showing it off.

The Mayor looked between Sportacus and Robbie with a haggard expression. “Don’t tell me, someone invented something and now everyone is turning into animals.”

Given some of the things that had happened in LazyTown in the past, that wasn’t an entirely unreasonable conclusion to make. Still, Sportacus couldn’t help but laugh. “No, no. Don’t worry Mayor. It’s just me and Robbie.”

This didn’t really ease Mayor Meanswell’s mind, but at this point in his career he knew better than to ask questions. “Well, uh, alright then. I trust you’ll make sure nobody gets into any trouble.”

“You can count on me, Mr. Mayor.” Sportacus promised.

Mayor Meanswell moved on to other, important mayor-ly duties, and Sportacus breathed a little sight of relief. If the Mayor of LazyTown accepted an elf and a fae in his town, then there truly was nothing to worry about.

Robbie, meanwhile, was rather exhausted by the encounter. And rather irked that his wing had been stepped on. He couldn’t shake the feeling that the more people knew about his . . . inhuman-ness, the more likely something bad would happen.

“Well, I’m going back home.” Robbie gathered up his coat in his arms and folded up his wings tightly against his back to prevent any more mishaps. “I think I’ve had enough people for the day.”

“Oh, okay Robbie.” Sportacus had hoped to entice his boyfriend into playing today, but was proud of the man for even coming outside. “I’ll see you tonight, then.”

“Tonight.” Robbie snapped his fingers, then vanished. He was looking forward to just sitting in his chair for a while, watching tv, and eating some cake. Comfort activities.

Reassured that he would at least be welcome in the lair later, Sportacus turned around to return to playing with the children. That was, until he spotted a certain pink head of hair lurking in a bush not far away.

“It isn’t polite to listen to other people’s conversations.” Sportacus reprimanded gently as Stephanie revealed herself.

“Sorry, Sportacus.” Stephanie scuffed her toe in the dirt, but didn’t seem all that apologetic as she looked at the hero slyly. “I just couldn’t help but notice you’ve been spending a lot of time with Robbie lately.”

 “H-have I now?” Sportacus had known the kids would notice something was up, he’d just hoped he’d have a little more time.

"You never used to go to his house, and you haven’t been going up to your airship at night.” Stephanie elaborated. “Sportacus, was the date you went on last week with Robbie?”

Sportacus was a bit taken aback. The girl had hit the nail right on the head. “Yes. It was.” He admitted, unable and unwilling to lie. “Robbie and I are dating now. That’s why I spend more time with him.”

“Oh.” Stephanie was a little surprised to be proven right. “Really? You and Robbie?” Her face scrunched up as she tried to picture it. “But he hates sportscandy, and exercise, and everything you like.”

“People don’t have to share interests to be in love.” Sportacus said with a little laugh. “Love is a little funny like that.”

“Does that mean that Robbie won’t be trying to make you leave town anymore?”

 “I don’t think he’s really tried to make me leave in a long time.” To be honest, Sportacus had always found Robbie’s schemes more amusing than malicious. They rarely caused any lasting damage, and everyone usually had a lot of fun or learned something important in the mean time. Sportacus crouched down in front of Stephanie to address her a little more seriously. “Stephanie, please do not tell the others about this. I want to make sure Robbie is okay with other people knowing. Alright?”

“Okay, Sportacus.” Stephanie nodded. “I won’t tell anyone else. I promise.”

“Thank you, Stephanie.” Sportacus pulled her into a brief hug, then stood. “Now, come on. Let’s make sure the others haven’t destroyed the play field while we’ve been gone, hmm?”

 

 

Robbie arrived in his lair with a sigh of relief. Draping his coat on the back of his chair, he immediately shuffled over to his fridge to have a look inside. Ignoring the healthier options that had somehow snuck in there, he selected a large slice of cake and went back to his fluffy armchair. The TV dropped down from the ceiling, and Robbie went through the familiar routine of flipping through the endless channels until he settled on something suitably mind-numbing to watch. Relaxation at it’s finest.

It was another several hours before a polite knock on the pipes above indicated that evening and come and Sportacus was back. Robbie sent up a courtesy “come in” (and really, why did Sportacus even bother to knock anymore, he knew he was welcome), and Sportacus shot out of one of the pipes a moment later.

“Good evening, Robbie.” Sportacus was quick to come over and give his boyfriend a kiss on the cheek, before looking down at the frosting-covered plate in his hands disapprovingly. “Have you eaten anything besides that cake today?”

“No.” Robbie admitted, allowing the plate to be taken from him.

Biting back the reprimand he wanted to give, Sportacus just shook his head and wandered over to the kitchen. “Is there anything you’d like to eat?”

Robbie shrugged, then remembered that Sportacus couldn’t see him from in the kitchen. “Whatever. Just as long as it isn’t fruit and vegetables!”

Rolling his eyes, Sportacus dug in the freezer until he located a microwave dinner that didn’t look too terrible and gave the instructions a quick browse. He really should probably learn to cook one of these days, if only to get something healthier into his boyfriend than TV dinners. The fridge offered up a large slice of watermelon for Sportacus, who grazed on it idly as he waited for the microwave to beep.

“I had a talk with Stephanie earlier.” Sportacus offered casually as he returned to the main room and gave Robbie his food. “She knows that we’re dating.”

“What?” Robbie choked on his food, forcing Sportacus to give him a helpful thump on the back that knocked the wind out of him. “Y-you told the brats?”

“The _kids_ are very smart, Robbie.” Sportacus finished the meat of his watermelon slice, then started in on the rind. Robbie gave him a disgusted look at the sight. “We cannot hide forever. And I want to be able to hold your hand, and kiss you, in public.”

Robbie looked down at his hands, suddenly finding his dinner less appetizing than it had been moments before.

“Robbie, what’s wrong?” Sportacus moved to kneel in front of his boyfriend, taking both of the man’s large, pale hands in his own. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to, but I think it would be better. The towns people like me, they like you. I see no reason we shouldn’t tell them. At least then Bessie will stop trying to set me up with her friends.”

Robbie snorted at that, but his tone remained bitter. “Clearly, you’ve never been shoved in a locker and called names for the way you look at other boys.”

“Someone did that to you?” Sportacus’s eyes went wide, making him strongly resemble a kicked puppy. Though Sportacus knew that humans had different ways of dealing with gender and sexuality than elves did, he couldn’t image that. To be so cruel as to make fun of someone because they loved another of the same gender. Sportacus shifted to sit on the arm of the furry orange chair instead so that he could pull Robbie into a sideways hug. “I’m very sorry. No one deserves that.”

Robbie shrugged half-heartedly, then gave a deep sigh. “Well. I’m tired. I’m going to go take a bath.”

“Okay, Robbie.” Sportacus took his half-finished plate and returned to the kitchen to stow the leftovers in the fridge. (He’d see if he could get Robbie to finish it later.) He figured he’d spend the rest of the evening stretching and doing exercises, until a shout from down the hall distracted him.

“Well, are you going to join me or what?!”

Sportacus’s tail curled happily as a broad smile stretched across his face. That sounded like a much better way to spend the evening."Coming!"  
  


 

As a whole, Sportacus wasn’t incredibly fond of Robbie’s lair. It was large, and echoing, and being underground meant that it always had an aura of damp and dark no matter how many lights were lit. It’s one redeeming quality, however, was the bath.

The airship, as much as Sportacus loved it, had a small, compact ‘head’ which required sitting on the toilet and pumping a foot pedal to get water pressure for the small over-head spigot. It was plenty adequate for getting clean, but it wasn’t exactly “relaxing.”

In setting up the old underground bunker into a home, Robbie had spared no expense on building himself a true _bath_. It stood separate from the shower, in it’s own section of the bathroom in the back of the lair. The pool was deep enough to submerge one’s whole body, and plenty large enough for two full-grown adults. Sportacus had seen it the few times he’d showered at Robbie’s place, but hadn’t yet been invited to use it. Until now.

As Sportacus entered the well-appointed bathroom, the tub was already filling with hot, steaming water and the scent of lavender filled the air. Robbie was bent over the bath, now undressed save for a towel around his waist, sprinkling bath salts into the purple-tinged water.

Robbie quickly set his towel aside and sunk into the steaming water, ducking below the surface and ruffling his feathers to make sure the water got all the way to his skin between every single feather. The hot water made quick work of the tension and tightness of his muscles, soothing away the aches and pains of his back until he felt more like a relaxed puddle of goo than a part-fae.

A splash made Robbie open his eyes, and the man immediately went bright red at the sight of Sportacus stepping into the bath as well. The elf hadn’t bothered with anything like a towel for modesty, and distantly Robbie realized this was the first time he was seeing his boyfriend completely nude. Sportacus was certainly. . . well appointed, and a part of Robbie’s mind noted that elf genitalia didn’t seem too dissimilar from a humans.

Then, fortunately for Robbie’s distracted brain, Sportacus sank down into the water and leaned back until his hair touched the water. Below the surface, his feet and legs found those of his boyfriend, tangling with them happily.“Mmm, this is wonderful, Robbie. I haven’t been able to truly bathe like this since I left home.”

“Please tell me you at least have a shower in that ridiculous airship of yours.” Robbie commented, pulling his mind from dirtier places. One of Sportacus’s feet was in a _very_ distracting place, and he had no doubt the elf knew it.

“Of course. But it’s nothing like this.” Sportacus cupped his hands and splashed water over his face and into his hair. “It’s wonderful.”

“Well, with what I go through every day, I have to relax somehow.” Some days, in fact, it was a real struggle to even get out of the bath. Here, in the warm scented water, the worries and problems of the outside world ceased to exist. It wasn’t uncommon for Robbie to stay until the water had gone cold.

“Would you like me to wash your hair and back?” Sportacus offered, having locating a bottle of shampoo next to the pool.

Turning around was a bit of a difficult task, despite the size of the bath Sportacus still couldn’t quite avoid being smacked with Robbie’s wings, but after a bit of rearranging the elf managed to get himself situated between his boyfriend’s wings with full access to his complement of black feathers. Picking up the shampoo, he squirted a liberal amount into his palms and began the task of trying to scrub the thick, greasy pomade out of Robbie’s hair.

Soon, Robbie was leaning back against his boyfriend’s muscular chest, letting the deep, rumbling purr the elf was producing vibrate through his body. Sportacus gently rinsed the suds from Robbie’s hair, then moved lower to start massaging soap into the man’s feathers. Robbie squirmed a bit when the elf’s hands found the sensitive spot at the base of his wings, right on the underside where bare skin became downy feathers, and a chirp bubbled up from his throat. Amused, Sportacus stroked the spot again, this time rewarded with another chirp that tapered off into a little stutter in Robbie’s throat. Despite his resemblance to a large raven, the man sounded more like a happy dove.

“How cute.” Sportacus whispered into Robbie’s ear. “Elves purr, and it turns out that fae coo.”

“I do not.” Robbie denied heatedly, ears going red with embarrassment. He was proven wrong, however, moments later when Sportacus wrung another pleased coo from him by running fingers through his covert feathers.

“Yes, you do.” Sportacus kissed the shell of his ear, “Don’t worry. I won’t tell anyone. I’d rather keep something so adorable all to myself.”

Robbie sunk lower in the water, letting out an affronted huff at being called ‘adorable.’ He didn’t pull away from the hands still weaving through his feathers, however, only shifting slightly to allow Sportacus better access. He’d just have to get back at the elf for that one later.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A tiny ship's head is the bathroom I have. Robbie's bathroom is the bath I -wish- I had. 
> 
> Also: please to picture this cooing sound. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-qS77R0Y1K8


	4. Chapter 4

“Nope! I’m not doing it and you can’t make me!”

Sportacus sighed and crossed his arms. “Come on, Robbie, it will be fine. Nothing bad will happen to you, I promise.”

“You can’t know that!” Robbie countered, voice beginning to get a little hysterical. “What if I plummet straight down? What if I break a leg? Or a wing? What if I break a leg and a wing?”

“We aren’t that high.” The airship was hovering just barely above the height of the trees around the town playfield. Sportacus and Robbie were standing on the lowered boarding platform, which really,  
honestly, wasn’t that far off the ground. In fact, Sportacus was a little nervous having his ship this close to the treetops and houses of the town.

These facts didn’t seem to be reassuring Robbie any. The man was clinging to the pole in the center of the platform for dear life, eyes squeezed tightly shut.

“Robbie.” Sportacus lowered his voice, trying to be reassuring. “You have wings. Even if you don’t fly, you can glide. I’m right here, I won’t let anything happen to you.”

“Last I checked, elves can’t fly.” Robbie wasn’t about to take flying advice from someone without wings. A light breeze rocked the airship, making the platform sway, and Robbie screamed. “Get me down RIGHT NOW!”

Clearly, it was time to call it a day. Sportacus commanded the airship to land, Robbie jumping down to the safe, solid grass the second they touched down.

“Safe, sweet earth.” Robbie kissed the field, then spluttered loudly when he got grass in his mouth. “I never want to do that again.”

“It isn’t that bad.” Sportacus sighed. He had really hoped to make some progress, but clearly today would not be the day. It was difficult for the elf to understand his boyfriend’s intense phobia of heights, especially now that he had a lovely, fully grown in set of wings. Of course, phobias didn’t always make sense. Gently, Sportacus knelt down next to Robbie. “Are you going to be okay?”

“I’ll be fine now that you aren’t trying to throw me off your stupid airship.” Still, Robbie’s knees shook as he slowly stood back up. “I don’t know how you live in that thing.”

“I trust it to stay aloft.” Sportacus helped support his boyfriend, pulling him in close. “Just like you should trust your wings.”

Robbie snorted. He certainly didn’t trust his wings. They’d caused him nothing but trouble his entire life, he had no way to be sure that they wouldn’t fail him in the air. Best to stay comfortably, firmly, on the ground. Or even better, under the ground, where pesky things like the much too bright sun and the much too loud children couldn’t bother him.

“I’m going home.”

Sportacus watched as his boyfriend headed back towards his lair and sighed. That could’ve gone better.

 

Once underground, Robbie collapsed into his armchair with relief. He shuffled around, turning this way and that as he tried to get comfortable, until he was upside down with his feet on the headrest and his head pillowed on the extended footrest. His wings draped over the arms, and it wasn’t really comfortable but Robbie also didn’t feel like moving anymore. It had gotten a lot harder to relax in his armchair since he had sprouted an enormous pair of feathered wings from his back. They got in the way of just about everything, and almost none of his clothes fit anymore. Robbie was also hyper-aware of the open stares he got where-ever he went, though Sportacus seemed utterly unaware in that blindly trusting way he had. Of course, the elf had an incredibly cute, happy little tail, while Robbie had an enormous pair of wings that liked to knock over store displays of soup and sweep entire shelves clear of their wares.

The television wasn’t much of a distraction as Robbie became aware of a deepening ache between his shoulderblades. Though the pain didn’t come as often now as it once had, it still lingered in the background and sometimes flared. Eventually, it became too painful for Robbie to be lying on his back and he was forced to wiggle around in his chair until he was laying on it backwards with his chin on the top of the backrest. His spine protested the curve it was forced into as a result, but at least his weight was off his back.

This was, of course, how Sportacus found him several hours later.

“Robbie?” Sportacus was somewhat accustomed to finding his boyfriend contorted into unusual and seemingly uncomfortable positions, but this was a new one. “Are you okay?”

Robbie just groaned in response, not quite coherent enough to form an intelligent answer. Though he was less tired during the day now that he was getting actual sleep at night, aching pain always robbed him of any and all energy that he might otherwise have.

“Does your back hurt?” Sportacus softly ran his fingers through Robbie’s feathers, causing the man to give a loud hiss of pain at the touch. “I’m sorry, Robbie. Here, lets get you more comfortable.”

It was a slightly tricky task to pick up Robbie without touching his back, made more difficult by the awkward position the man had taken up in the chair, but Sportacus managed after a moment of struggle. Then it was off to the bedroom, where the lights could be turned down low and Robbie laid out comfortably on his front. Sportacus cast a light heating spell on a pillow, then laid it on his boyfriend’s upper back. Robbie let out a deep groan as the heat worked its way down into his muscles. 

“Rest up.” Sportacus kissed the back of Robbie’s head gently, making a mental note to write his mother for more pain-reliever. “I’ll go make you some soup.”

“No vegetables.” Robbie muttered into his pillow. 

“It’ll be chicken noodle, then.” Assuming he could navigate the kitchen without setting off some kind of trap. Sportacus skipped out, refraining from flipping for the sake of his sick boyfriend.  
Robbie smiled despite himself. Because no matter how much the blue elf sometimes got on his nerves, he was always happy to feed his poor, starving boyfriend. Even if he kept trying to sneak fruits into otherwise perfectly un-healthy things. 

 

One of the nice things about LazyTown was how small it was. Everyone knew everyone else, and one could not walk down the street without being greeted by neighbors and friends. Of course, that was also one of its downsides. A person’s business quickly became everyone’s business, and news spread quickly. 

The upshot of this was that within a day of Robbie and Sportacus revealing their true nature to the children the entire town knew that the odd recluse who lived out at the edge of town and the energetic town babysitter were actually magical creatures. (Though everyone knew Sportacus had pointed ears, most of the adults assumed that it was an odd birth defect and that the elf story was just for the kids. The tail, however, was much harder to explain away) There were a few people who were rather uncomfortable with the idea that the children of the town were being looked after by someone not human, but fortunately most of the adults in town seemed to associate elves with some series of movies about a ring instead of the old legends of hidden folk kidnapping people. 

People seemed a little more nervous around Robbie, probably because the man didn’t really fit the human image of a small, delicate being with insect wings. Not a cranky insomniac with twelve foot raven wings that had a mind of their own. 

Certain sordid rumors about the pair, which had been gossiped about amongst the bored housewives ever since Sportacus had arrived in town two years before, also gained some speed. (They liked to imagine a variety of kinky and probably impossible things that could be done with wings or a tail. If Sportacus heard, he’d probably be scandalized. If Robbie heard, he’d probably write them down to attempt later.)

The grapevine did, at least, work equally well in reverse. The kids loved little more than sharing the latest gossip with their hero, after all. When Sportacus went to play with the kids and help celebrate their last day of school, they were all beside themselves to be the first to say the news. 

“Whoa, whoa, whoa.” Sportacus pulled the kids off each other, looking between them before choosing one to speak. “Ziggy, What is so important to tell me?”

“Well we were coming home from school, and it’s the last day so we got out early and all so we’d have more time to play! And we were walking here from the school house, and it took longer than usual so sorry we’re late-“

“Ziggy.” Sportacus put both hands on the boy’s shoulders. “Breathe.”

Ziggy paused and took a deep breath, blurting out the last part of his tale in one go. “we went pass the house for sale on Front st and there was a moving van in front of it!”

“Somebody new is moving into LazyTown!” Stephanie added excitedly.

“It’ll be the first new resident we’ve gotten since Stephanie moved here two years ago.” Pixel elaborated. 

It was very rare for new people to move to LazyTown. People were born, grew up, and died in LazyTown. Most had lived in the town for generations, since its founding over two centuries before. New faces in town were something to be rejoiced indeed. 

“I hope they’ll have kids we can play with.” Trixie commented. They could do so much more with another kid on their sports teams, like maybe finally beat Sportacus. 

“I will have to go and greet them.” Stingy said, with the air of a monarch intending to meet a new subject. 

“That is a wonderful idea, Stingy.” Sportacus grinned, “We should make them something to say hello. Why don’t you go make something to give to the new family?”

The kids all immediately scrambled off, arguing over what would be the best Welcome-to-LazyTown gift, and Sportacus watched them go. His tail swished behind him a tad nervously as he considered this development. New people in LazyTown.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, sorry for the sudden silence from me. I've been having serious laptop issues for a while now, and have been focusing more on my art and less on writing lately.

            It took a little while for the kids to organize themselves enough to put together a welcoming gift for the new family. (And to convince Stingy that ‘the honor of his presence’ wasn’t exactly a gift.) Finally, they all managed to agree on a fruit basket, each kid contributing their favorite sportscandy.

             Sportacus added an apple to the top of the basket cheerfully, then ushered the gaggle of kids down the street towards the house with the moving truck parked in front of it. A neatly dressed, thin man carried a box into the house, the door barely having time to close before someone else came out. The next person out of the house was a young man that looked around Pixel’s age, about thirteen or so, with a green beanie pulled low over his head and a definite slouch to his shoulders. The poor teen barely had time to react before he was suddenly mobbed by the other kids, each asking questions over each other.

            “I’m sorry.” Sportacus quickly tried to get the kids under control, though really it was a futile effort. “Okay guys, calm down. He can’t answer your questions if you talk this fast.”

            Mercifully, the kids scrambled back a bit to give their new friend a little breathing room.

            “They are just excited to see someone new.” Sportacus apologized again, softening his voice when he saw how petrified the young man was. “My name is Sportacus, what is yours?”

            “Uh. J- Jives.” His eyes went wide as he peered out from under his hat and really saw Sportacus. “Dude, what’s with your ears?”

            “Sportacus is an elf!” Ziggy butted in excitedly. “A real elf. And he has a tail too, and he plays with us all the time, and can do really cool sports tricks!”

            “I have come to welcome you to _my_ town.” Stingy stepped forward regally, extending a hand. Jives didn’t even look at him, too busy staring at the tail flicking behind Sportacus. The elf had gotten so used to not covering himself it hadn’t even occurred to him that new people might be shocked by him. Too late now.

            “What Stingy means is, _we_ wanted to welcome you to Lazytown.” Thank goodness for Stephanie, who held out the fruitbasket they had made and offered their new friend a broad smile. “Here, we all put this together for you.”

            Jives finally tore his gaze from Sportacus to accept the fruitbasket with an expression of confusion. “Uh. Thanks?”

            “JAMES!” The front door to the house banged open, a woman leaning out and spotting the assembled group with some surprise. “And who are your little friends?”

            “Welcome to LazyTown!” Stephanie chirped in response. “We love to play outside, and have fun, and you’re always welcome to join us, Jives.”

            “Well, that’s very nice.” The adult woman, Jives’ mother, came down to gently take the fruit basket from her son, though her smile seemed a little weak and insincere. Then she caught sight of Sportacus, and the smile faded further. Her gaze lingered on the elf’s ears and tail. “A little early for Halloween, isn’t it?”

            “The children do love dress-up.” Sportacus responded vaguely, which wasn’t a lie. Folk from outside LazyTown were a risk, though he still politely offered a hand. “My name is Sportacus.”

            “Samantha.” The woman responded, shaking his hand gingerly. “Are you one of the childrens’ father?”

            “Oh, no.” Sportacus said with a laugh. He was still a little young for children by elf standards. “I’m the town hero. I make sure the children play outside, and eat healthy, and save them when they’re in trouble.”

             Samantha just sort of nodded in response, pretending she understood, before turning to her own child. “Come on, James. We still have to unpack everything. You can play with your little friends tomorrow.”

             Jives gave them a little wave goodbye as he was ushered back into the house, which all of the kids returned before making their way back to the playfield. They were all a little sad that they couldn’t play with their new friend today, but there was hope for the future.

 

 

           

 

            Later that evening, after the kids had gone back home for dinner, Sportacus related his encounter with LazyTown’s newest residents to Robbie, who look a decidedly less positive view of things.

             “That woman will be nothing but trouble,” Robbie predicted, lounging in his armchair with an enormous bowl of popcorn in his arms. Some television show was playing in a language that Sportacus didn’t understood (nor did he think Robbie knew it, but the man often watched strange things), though at this point it was mostly background noise. “Typical PTA mom.”

             “I’m sure we just surprised her.” Sportacus argued. “The kids were very excited.”

             “I’ll bet the happy-dappy, flippy floppy elf didn’t help much.” Robbie said, voice taking on a teasing tone.

             “I didn’t do a single flip in front of her.” Sportacus countered, leaning down to give his boyfriend a kiss to the forehead. Robbie squeaked in surprise, feathers all ruffling up in a way that Sportacus thought was very endearing. “I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

 

           

 

            The next day, all the kids were very disappointed that their much anticipated new playmate did not make an appearance. Sportacus reminded them that Jives had only just moved into a new house, and was probably very busy unpacking. He was sure the boy would join them once he had settled in. Teaching the kids how to play Pickleball was a wonderful distraction, and soon they were all whacking balls over the small net with much enthusiasm. (Though Trixie had to be reminded that the objective was not, in fact, to hit the people on the opposing team.)

             Robbie, meanwhile, was busily planning a way to ruin the kid’s fun for the day. (Not permanently, mind, but he couldn’t just _let_ them be up there screaming and shouting without doing _something_.) This time, it was a mechanical spider that would unravel their nets, forcing them to cease playing. Unless, of course, they could figure out how to reverse its systems, at which time it would weave nets instead of unweave them, but at least that would keep them occupied with their brains instead of their muscles. A few hour’s peace.

             Sneaking up to the surface, Robbie grinned as he crept towards the playfield with his little robot in hand. His plan was put on pause, however, when he saw someone else slowly making their way to the center of town. This must be the new kid Sportacus had mentioned. Jeeves, or something. Rather than the enthusiastic expression most of the little brats had, the boy looked nervous and apprehensive. Like he wasn’t quite sure if he _really_ wanted to go play. Robbie could sympathize.

             Finally, after several minutes, Robbie could stand watching the kid’s indecisive shuffling no longer. “Well?” He asked loudly, stepping out from his hiding place in the bushes. “Are you going to go play with them or what?”

             The teen looked over in surprise, taking a step back as he saw Robbie suddenly appear in all his purple-suited, winged glory. “Yo, what the heck?” His ‘rapper boy’ accent made Robbie cringe. Obviously, someone had moved here from the city. “Y-you’ve got wings dude! What are you?”

            “What, never seen a faery before? Welcome to the country, kiddo.” Robbie retorted, pulling his wings closer to himself. “Why aren’t you playing with the other kids?”

             Jeeves (or whatever) shrugged his shoulders apathetically. “Dunno. I just don’t wanna interrupt, or anything.”

             “Interrupt?” Robbie snorted. “Those children would love nothing better than to have another kid to add to their horde. Go join them, I’m sure the elf and his brood would be happy to have you.”

             The teen took a hesitant step towards the other kids, then another. He glanced back at Robbie, who made an impatient shooing motion with his hands. Finally, the teen came within sight of the playfield. It took the kids a moment to notice him, as wrapped up in their game as they were, but once they did the newcomer was welcomed in enthusiastically. Robbie felt a hint of a smile on his face, before he realized what he had done and cursed. Damn. There went his plan of stopping their play time.

 

 

 

            “Jives came out to play with us today.” Sportacus reported to his boyfriend later that evening.

             “Oh did he?” Robbie said innocently, scooping out a large dollop of ice cream from a huge carton and plopping it into a bowl.

             “He is a very nice boy.” Sportacus commented. He was standing next to Robbie in the man’s kitchen, deftly slicing up some tomatoes to be added to his salad. “If a little shy. And he does talk a bit funny. And he really loves junk food.”

             Robbie snorted. “A boy after my own heart.” He added a healthy squirt of chocolate syrup to his ice cream, then looked over at his boyfriend’s disgustingly healthy after-dinner snack with a grimace. Sportacus returned the look with a disapproving one of his own, then the two retired to the living room to eat their respective dishes.


	6. Chapter 6

 

Robbie finally had a chance to unleash his sports-net-unweaving-spider 3000 (note to self: think of a better name later) on the kids the next day. He wove a quick glamour that let him hide in one of the bushes (though if you looked closely you could still see his wings, covering those up was still a work in progress), and cackled with glee at the angered faces of the children as they watched their sports nets unravel into piles of string. Now maybe they’d go inside and do something nice and quiet. Like paint, or read books, or play video games. 

Sportacus called down a soccer ball, but Robbie’s little spider went and unwove the soccer nets too. And the nets in the basketball hoops, and every other piece of woven string in the area. It was beautiful. 

The kids stood there, wondering what just happened to all their things, when Jives pulled something out of his pocket and held it out to the group. It was a little, yarn beanbag. Robbie frowned and leaned in closer, curious to see just what it was. The teen dropped the small ball and started batting it up and down with his feet, much like Sportacus did whenever he got within ten feet of a soccer ball. 

After a moment showing off, Jives kicked the beanbag towards Sportacus, who very quickly caught on to the game. The elf kicked it about with glee, bouncing it off his head, chest, elbows, and everywhere else besides his hands. The other kids got into it as well, and soon the whole group was kicking it back and forth enthusiastically. Ziggy gave it a particularly savage kick that sent it sailing out of the playfield and towards the bushes. 

“Oops!” The child cried, going running after the beanbag on his short little legs. 

Robbie buried himself a little deeper into the foliage as Ziggy approached, watching as the youngest of the kids got closer and closer. Picking up the beanbag, Ziggy looked up at the bushes and chirped “Hi Robbie!” before going back to the others. He really needed to work on his glamours, clearly. 

Ziggy ran back to the group and gave the beanbag a toss to Sportacus. That’s when things got. . .weird. The elf leaned back, intending to bounce the ball off his chest, but all that fell onto him was a pile of dust as the little knit bag disintegrated midair. Sportacus raised his eyebrows in surprise and brushed a few strings of yarn from his chest, then gave a little yelp and slapped his bicep. 

The kids immediately crowded around, asking if Sportacus was alright, was he hurt, and where’d their hacky sack go? Sportacus reassured them that he was fine, only to flinch when one of the sleeves of his shirt unraveled into nothing. 

His vest was the next to go, the very fabric unweaving into its individual strands to leave nothing left except the metal backpack clasps and his crystal casing. That done, the affliction started on his shirt. 

With a start, Robbie realized what had happened. His net-unweaving-spider, having run out of sports nets to unweave, had clearly decided to start unravelling clothing instead. The villain lept from the bushes and ran forward, attempting to reach Sportacus and remove the robot before the elf ended up naked in the middle of town. Sportacus, meanwhile, was attempting to retreat but suddenly found himself boxed in by an anxious boyfriend with enormous wings, plus all the kids. 

“Whoa, it’s okay, it’s okay,” Sportacus tried to get them to back off, but it was hard to convince them when his shirt kept getting smaller and smaller. It had eaten through his belt as well, forcing Sportacus to keep a hand on his pants lest they slip off.

Finally, Robbie let out an “A-HA!” and held up his hand triumphantly, a little black spider robot pinched between his thumb and forefinger. He quickly turned the robot off, but it was a little too late as the last of Sportacus’ shirt gave up, leaving him bare-chested and awkwardly holding his pants on with one hand. It probably would’ve been nice, if they hadn’t been standing surrounded by kids in the middle of town. 

That’s when they heard the scream.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maybe I'm taking Jives' mom too over the top, but goodness she makes such a fun villain. Come on, somebody has to notice that the adults of LazyTown have been letting a strange man who came out of the sky play with their children completely unsupervised.

            Of all the adults in LazyTown to have walked onto the playfield at that exact moment, it had to be the one that just moved to town. Their predicament didn’t exactly look good, even Sportacus had to admit that, but the locals of LazyTown at least were used to the bizarre and unexplainable. The sight of Sportacus, town hero and elf, in the middle of the playground shirtless while the town villain fussed over him, 12 foot wingspan spread defensively, certainly counted as somewhat bizarre and rather unexplainable.

             “What are you people?!” The voice of Samantha Mjoi, mother to Jives and newcomer to Lazytown, hit a pitch unpleasant to Sportacus’ ears as she stared at the scene.

             “Please, just calm down.” Sportacus held up his hands to try and stave off further outburst. Unfortunately, he forgot that one hand had been occupied holding up his pants, with the result that the battered item of clothing fell to his ankles. Bright red, Spotacus immediately stopped down and hoisted his pants up once more, but the damage had been done.

             “No, I won’t calm down!” Samantha refused to be tamed. She had her son by the shoulders now, holding him close as though she could shield him from the .  . .debauchery in front of her. “You two are some kind of freaks. Perverts! _Homosexuals_!” The tail she had thought was clever costuming was all too clearly real, the way the fur faded into Sportacus’ spine was too convincing to be faked, and then there was the tall man with the giant wings. Clearly, something was very wrong in Lazytown. “Demons! Get away from these children before I call the police!”

                 Robbie felt like pointing out that LazyTown hardly had anything passing for a police department, but was too cowed to speak. This whole scene had suddenly become all of his childhood fears personified. Instead he turned to Sportacus, who looked rather like someone had kicked a puppy in front of him.

                 “Please.” Sportacus tried again, “I am not a demon, I am an elf, and I am here to-“

                 Samantha pulled out her cell phone and began to dial, still holding Jives to her. The teen looked scared, but it wasn’t Sportacus and Robbie he was afraid of.

                 “Let’s go.” Robbie said in a low voice. He grabbed Sportacus by the forearm, and before the elf could say anything more he teleported them both out of the playfield and back to his lair.

 

 

               

                “I knew this would happen!” Robbie exclaimed as soon as he was back in the comfort of his underground home. He rounded on Sportacus, only to lose whatever words he was going to say at the sight of his boyfriend.   At one time, Robbie would’ve been thrilled to see the elf looking so utterly broken, but now it was just painful to observe.

                 “The council was right.” Sportacus stumbled backwards into the fluffy orange chair and sat down with a thump. “Humans shouldn’t know about us. It doesn’t lead to anything good.”

                 “It’s not your fault!” Robbie insisted heatedly, though he had been all too ready to lay all the blame on the elf a few seconds before. “It’s that horrible hag of a woman! Accusing you, of all people, of being _inappropriate_ around kids. When you’re around the kids, it’s so sweet I’m amazed you don’t go into sugar meltdown.”

                 Sportacus stared at his boyfriend, torn between laughing and crying at the fae’s description. To think of Robbie, of all people, describing him playing with the kids as _sweet_. But it was probably all a lost cause now.

                 “Come on. Nobody else in town is going to listen to that lady.” Robbie tried to be the encouraging one for once. “Hang out tonight, then go back up tomorrow and everybody will have forgotten all about it.”

                 “You’re right.” Sportacus took a deep breath and remembered his own training. Self-confidence was important. He couldn’t let this get him down. LazyTown knew him, more than the new woman knew him, and they wouldn’t let him down.

                 Robbie boggled for a moment at being called ‘right,’ before deciding that the best thing to do right now would be to draw a bath and have a lazy night in. Turning away, he sauntered towards the living space of the lair with an enticing sway of his hips. As he reached the doorway, he turned back to look at his boyfriend, still seated someone dumbfounded in the armchair, and crooked his finger invitingly. Sportacus near launched himself out of the chair in response, eagerly bouncing over to Robbie when summoned. He liked where this was going.  . .

 

 

                Unfortunately for Sportacus and Robbie, Samantha Mjoi was not a woman who took things lying down. She believed in being proactive and getting things done. With that in mind, her first stop after the debacle in the park was straight to city hall to complain to none other than Mayor Meanswell.

                 “I just can’t believe that Sportacus would do anything wrong.” Mayor Meanswell said in astonishment after listening to the complaints of their town’s newest citizen. “He’s been here for two years now, and is always so much help.”

                 “You’ve been letting this man be alone with your children for _two years_?” Samantha’s voice reached shriek qualities, making Mayor Meanswell wince. “And what about that other one? The gay one with the wings and all the makeup.”

                 “G- You mean Robbie Rotten?” The Mayor sat back in surprise. “Mr. Rotten is rather reclusive and.  . .odd, but he is a genius inventor and a valued citizen of this town.”

                 “Well I don’t want either of them alone, unsupervised with my son.” Samantha insisted. “Or another the other children. I can’t believe you have let this strange, obviously disturbed man be around your kids with no questions asked. I will get the other parents together on this.”

                 The idea of an army of parents led by Samantha was too horrifying for Mayor Meanswell to contemplate. He sat back in his chair behind his desk and tried not to look too scared. He was pretty sure the woman in front of him could smell fear. “I- I’ll see what I can do.”

                 “See that you do.” Samantha turned on her heel and marched out.

 

 

 

                The next day, the kids gathered in the park as they usually did on weekends. Normally, Saturdays were when Sportacus came with an idea for a game that would be fun for the whole day. That day, however, the big, blue elf was conspicuously absent.

                 “Do you think he’s gonna come today?” Ziggy asked plaintively, sucking on a large lollipop with less enthusiasm than usual.

                 “Sportacus always comes.” Trixie had her arms crossed and was tapping her foot with impatience. “I mean. He can’t _not_ come.”

                 “I’m sorry, dudes.” Even Jives, looking miserable, had shown up. “I think my mom is like, gonna take out a restraining order. She really flipped her wig yesterday.”

                 “She was really scary,” Ziggy agreed.

                 “Just because Robbie Rotten played a trick on us yesterday.” Trixie said sourly. Then, a look of revelation came over her face. “Wait a second. Robbie Rotten. He’s been trying to get Sportacus to leave town since forever! I bet he thought of this whole thing!”

                 “There is a statistical likelihood.” Pixel agreed.

                 “Well then we should march right over and make Robbie fix this!” Trixie held up one of her fists in emphasis, clearly displaying how she meant to “make” Robbie fix the situation.

                 “Wait, we can’t just go beat Robbie up!” Stephanie protested as the group started getting riled up.

                 “Well why not?” Trixie demanded. “He got rid of Sportacus! He has to bring him back, he just has to!”

                “Robbie didn’t get rid of Sportacus.” Stephanie insisted.

                 “And how do you know that?”

                 “Because Robbie and Sportacus are dating!” Stephanie realized what she had just blurted out and clapped both hands over her mouth, but it was too late. “Oops.”

               

 

               


End file.
